Marriage Counseling in Japan

Marriage Counseling in Japan Love

Marriage counseling is a service that provides single men and women who wish to get married with consistent support from meeting the opposite sex to dating.

The goal is to find a marriage partner and then leave the agency, generally with the support and advice of a matchmaker, a professional in marriage activity.

Marriage agencies often have a storefront where you go to meet with a matchmaker, etc. Recently, however, marriage counseling services that can be completed online and offline matchmaking services are increasing.

What is the difference from other services? 

Marriage agencies are different from other services in that they provide consistent support throughout the process of engagement, including profile creation, introduction of a partner, matchmaking, dating, and proposal.

For example, a marriage agency comes with the following types of support

  • Introduction of the opposite sex
  • Arranging a meeting date
  • Collection of replies
  • Advice and follow-up on general engagement activities
  • Counseling during dating
  • Counseling until proposal or marriage

Flow and structure of using a marriage counseling agency

The following is an introduction to the actual process of using a marriage counseling agency, and the order in which it progresses from admission to marriage.


Most marriage agencies offer a free consultation before admission. At the free consultation, you will receive advice and plan proposals from our staff based on your profile, expectations for a potential partner, and views on marriage.

Once you join, you will often be assigned a full-time concierge who will design a marriage activity plan tailored to your needs.

Matchmaking introductions

There are various styles of introductions depending on the dating agency, but the following are the most common.

  • Introduction by a matchmaker
  • Data matching
  • Searching by yourself using a condition search
  • Matchmaking application from a potential partner

If there is a partner you are interested in, you can apply for a meeting.

There is a limit to the number of people that can be introduced by a matchmaker each month and the number of people who can apply for a blind date.

Face-to-face meeting

If there is someone you are interested in, you will request a meeting. If the other party accepts your request and a meeting is arranged, the matchmaker will arrange the date and place for the meeting.

The meeting may be held at a hotel lounge, a coffee shop, or even over a video call.

After the meeting, you will tell the matchmaker whether or not you would like to meet again after the second meeting, and receive feedback and advice on the blind date.

Tentative dating

Once you have found a partner with whom you would like to have a relationship on the premise of marriage, you will enter the tentative dating step. Tentative dating is a state in which you determine whether or not you would like to date on the premise of marriage. Since provisional dating is not yet a girlfriend, you can proceed with other blind dates and provisional relationships with other partners in parallel.


After provisional dating, when you find a partner with whom you want to have a serious relationship on the premise of marriage, you will enter the dating step.

As the name suggests, dating is a state of being in a relationship on the premise of marriage. Once you have reached this stage, you are not allowed to have blind dates or temporary relationships with other partners. Therefore, while you are in a relationship, your membership is considered dormant. There are some dating agencies that do not charge a monthly fee during the recess, but each company handles this differently, so please check in advance.

Through the dating process, you will get to know each other better, and if both parties are firm in their intentions, the engagement will take place.

Leaving the marriage

Once the engagement is finalized, the couple will be allowed to leave the marriage. Although the timing of leaving the marriage ceremony differs from agency to agency, in general, leaving the marriage ceremony does not mean entering the registry of marriage.

In most cases, the couple will leave the marriage at the time when both parties have confirmed their intention to marry, when the marriage proposal is successful, or when the meeting between the two families is over.

Depending on the marriage agency, you may be required to pay an exit fee. Whether or not a marriage termination fee is required is always stated on the marriage agency’s website or in a pamphlet, so be sure to check before joining.

Advantages and Disadvantages of Marriage Agencies

Marriage Counseling advantage and disadvantage

There are naturally both advantages and disadvantages to using a marriage agency. Without knowing the disadvantages as well as the advantages, you may end up regretting your decision after joining a marriage agency, so it is important to properly understand its characteristics.


The advantages of a marriage agency include the following.

  • Advice and support from a matchmaker.
  • You can meet a partner whose identity is guaranteed.
  • You can be introduced to a partner who may be a good match for you.
  • You can meet people who have a desire to get married.

Marriage agencies are only active with members whose identities are guaranteed and who have a desire to get married, so you can proceed with your marriage activities more efficiently. In the case of dating in daily life or through matching apps, it is possible that there will be a temperature difference in your attitude toward marriage.

Even if you feel that you want to get married right away, if the other person does not have the same enthusiasm, it is possible that time just flies by……. On the other hand, marriage counseling services are for those who join on the premise of aiming for a successful marriage, so the advantage is that a gap in the desire to get married is unlikely to occur.

Another major feature is that you will receive extensive support from a matchmaker. If you are engaged in marriage activity alone, you may often end up doing it in the wrong way or approaching only the least desirable partners, and your marriage activity may go astray.

However, by receiving objective advice from a matchmaker who is a professional in marriage activity, you can proceed with your marriage activity in a tripod.


On the contrary, disadvantages include the following.

  • More expensive than other marriage activities
  • You may not always be introduced to the opposite sex of your choice
  • You may not always get a matchmaking offer.
  • You may not be able to join.

Compared to dating apps and marriage activity parties, marriage agencies are quite expensive. A marriage agency that offers extensive support will cost at least 100,000 yen to several hundred thousand yen. The major disadvantage is that if you do not have the financial means to pay this money and still want to engage in marriage activity, you cannot use the service in the first place.

Also, joining a marriage agency does not necessarily mean that you will meet the opposite sex of your choice. The person you are introduced to by the matchmaker may not be the type of person you like, and even if you apply for a blind date yourself, it will not take place unless the person you want to meet does not want to be matched with you.

If you are under the impression that if you join a marriage agency, you will be introduced to your ideal partner, you need to change your mind.