Preparation is the key to a successful first date. Make a solid plan before asking someone for a date. Make a date plan which Japanese women will enjoy and cherish. Achieve a good first impression on your first date so that it will lead you to a second date.
What is the purpose of the first date?
Before going on a date, always check your purpose. Is it too firm? No, no, not at all. Since it is your first time, it is better to set a firm goal and go for what will lead you to a good result.
But first, let us look at the purpose of the first date.
To get as close to the other person as possible.
Since it is the first date, both parties are probably still in a state of not knowing each other well. Naturally, both parties will be nervous, and it is expected that things will feel awkward.
Let’s start by easing the tension between the two of you by shortening the distance between you as much as possible. If both parties are relaxed together, it will lead to a comfortable feeling towards each other.
Entertain the other person.
On a first date, your priority should be to entertain the other person rather than to enjoy yourself. Would you want to spend a day with someone who is boring? I don’t think so. The same goes for Japanese women.
If you are going to spend time together, a common desire for both men and women is to have a good time. For this reason, it is necessary for you to take a step back and adapt to your partner’s interests and tastes.
Connecting to the next date.
The most important thing to remember is that the first date should lead to the next date. The first two points above are only possible if there is a next date. Do your best to make the person think, “I want to spend time with this person again’. If you are able to set up the next appointment, then your first date was a success.
Methods for a Successful First Date
There is no way to be absolutely sure of success, but you can always avoid ways to fail. Let’s take a look at ways to avoid failure by summarizing what we have seen to those who have experienced setbacks.
The purpose is to lead to the next opportunity.
The purpose of the first date is only to lead to the next one. Trying to get it all on the first try will not work. There are plenty of opportunities to win in the future.
Don’t get impatient, crack the whip, and run out of steam.
It is important to enjoy yourself, but even more important to make sure the other person is enjoying themselves. Dates should be mutually enjoyable. It is a matter of course, but are you enjoying yourself? An adult man must be considerate of his partner. It is important to think about whether the other person is having fun first, rather than enjoying yourself.
Don’t be too pretentious just because it is your first date, but don’t let your guard down either.
Have the right amount of tension. Everyone is nervous on a first date. There are times when you may be overly enthusiastic. However, this is the time to keep an even keel. Dress like you are going out on the town with your friends and add a little accent to your outfit. Of course, you don’t want to be too relaxed and wear jerseys on top and bottom!
Don’t get impatient or discouraged if things don’t go the way you want them to.
Until recently, you were strangers to each other. There will be many things that don’t go as planned. Rather than bemoaning the fact that things didn’t go as planned, you need to enjoy it, or you won’t gain the trust of Japanese women. Be open-minded and ready to take on anything! Be open to anything and everything.
Keep in touch afterwards to make the next connection.
After the first date, you may feel relieved. You will never get a girlfriend if you don’t keep in touch with her for a while. You are on your own when you are able to provide aftercare for both dates and excursions. It is a good idea to wait for the other person to contact you first. Of course, don’t forget that she’s waiting for your e-mail, too!
Don’t give it all away.
Always be the guy with the secret. I understand the feeling of putting everything you have into the first date. But if you reveal everything about yourself there, you will have nothing to show on the next date. A man who always leaves a mystery behind. Japanese women are attracted to men who have a shadowy side to them.
Clothing
Even if you are going on a date with a Japanese woman whom you have met on a regular basis, you may be at a loss as to what to wear. And if it is your first date, there are even more important points to keep in mind. Be sure to keep them in mind so that you do not become disillusioned at first sight.
Cleanliness is most important!
When thinking about clothing, we tend to focus only on fashion taste and possessions, but what is more important is cleanliness. Japanese women do not like men who are unclean. No matter how good a man’s fashion sense is, if he is filthy, they will not want to spend time with him. On the contrary, men with a sense of cleanliness are preferred.
Do you have dandruff on your shoulders? Do you have a long nose hair or beard? Were your nails trimmed? Cleanliness is a very basic requirement. Check thoroughly before going on a date and make sure you are clean and presentable.
Pay attention to size.
What you are wearing is also a matter of taste. Be careful about the size of what you wear.
Be wary of people who buy clothes when they are skinny, but when they wear them now, they are too tight and snug. Wearing clothes in a size that does not fit your body shape will make you look sloppy.
The recommended size is a perfect fit. Check the size carefully when you buy. Be especially careful when buying online. If you are buying in a store, try on the clothes or ask the store staff to look at them to find the right size for your body.
Don’t let your feet out of your mind!
You have a great haircut and you are dressed to the nines! However, feet are often overlooked. Shoes are a very important element of fashion. It is said that you can tell a lot about a person’s character by what kind of shoes they are wearing.
First of all, shoes that are in shreds are a no-no. Shoes with peeling toes or worn heels are a no-no. Wearing shoes that have been well cared for will increase your reputation among Japanese women.
Seasonality and TPO are also important. Barefoot and sandals in winter are out of the question. Be careful not to embarrass the Japanese women you walk with.
Location
If you are not used to planning a first date, you may have trouble knowing where to go. What should you keep in mind when choosing a location?
It doesn’t depend on the weather.
It can be a memorable experience to be on a date when it suddenly starts to rain and the two of you have to take shelter from the rain together… but in reality, it is not only uncomfortable to get wet and dirty, but it often creates an awkward atmosphere between the two of you. Furthermore, some places may become inaccessible due to rain or strong winds.
Therefore, for a first date, choose a location that is not easily affected by the weather. If you must go outdoors, it is important to check the weather forecast in advance. It is not recommended for a first date to say, “It looks like it might rain, but I’ll take my chances….
Be prepared with alternatives.
Happenings are bound to occur on a first date. Even if you have already decided on a place, when you get there, you may find that it is so crowded that you have to wait your turn to get in, or that the restaurant is closed for renovations. When this happens, you will be in a hurry. You don’t want to bore a Japanese woman by taking time to decide on a new destination, or have her think you are indecisive because you can’t decide…you don’t want that to happen.
Be prepared for a sudden change of plans, and have a few other places in mind in advance. Japanese women will be impressed by your unflappable attitude.
Don’t overload your schedule.
Sometimes men make too many plans for a single date. They want to entertain the Japanese woman. I want us to have a lot of fun together! This is not a good idea, because it may tire out the Japanese women. If you take her around from place to place, Japanese women who are not confident in their physical strength will get tired from walking. To avoid leaving the other Japanese woman with the memory of a tiring date, consider a date plan that is also considerate of the other party.
Conversation
The unexpected silence that occurs during a date can be a frustrating moment for men who are not good talkers. What to talk about to get things going is a common problem on a first date. If you know how to create a topic of conversation, you will be able to have fun and keep the conversation going.
Don’t make it your own personal stage.
To be the sole speaker means to make the date your own stage. Some people are in such a hurry to find a topic of conversation that they talk only about themselves, but this is not recommended. Moreover, if you talk about yourself in a boastful or maniacal way, Japanese women will feel left out and bored.
When talking about yourself, keep it to a moderate level. Even if a Japanese woman seems interested in you, she may be fed up with you from the inside, so it is important to know when to end the conversation.
Ask questions.
For example, you can ask about the train lines you frequently use, your favorite smartphone apps, or other trivial things. Create a situation where you can get the Japanese woman to talk. But there are some things to keep in mind.
First, do not ask personal questions that go one step beyond. Prying into her family environment or past relationships on the first date may make the Japanese woman fall for you, so be careful. It is understandable that you are curious about the Japanese woman you like, but be patient.
Next, it is important to ask about areas that you also know about. It would be a waste if you end up just saying “Hmm,” even if she answers your question. It would be wonderful if you could get to know each other better on the first date.
Find a topic of conversation on the spot.
Many of you must be thinking, “I can’t do that! I’m sure there are a lot of people who think, “That’s impossible! It is true that finding a topic of conversation on the spot may seem difficult at first glance. However, it is actually easier than you might think.
The best way to do this is to talk about the location of the date. As with the previous point about choosing the right place, in many cases it is easier to have a conversation if the date is in a place where it is easy to talk about.
As an example, I particularly recommend movie theaters. After watching a movie, you can get excited about the content of the movie, so even those who have trouble creating a topic of conversation can spend time there without worry.
Another trick to keep the conversation going is to pick up the next topic from the content of the conversation. It is a good idea to connect the topics in an associative game style, such as “favorite celebrity,” “commercials featuring that celebrity,” and “have you ever used (eaten) the product in the commercial?
Dining
Meals are surprisingly important when going out with the opposite sex. Depending on the meal, it may determine whether or not you will be able to have a long-term relationship with the person you are dating. Let’s take note of what you should pay attention to on the first date.
Pay attention to the manner of the meal!
Manners do not necessarily mean that you have to know difficult table manners. Except in the case of going to a high-class restaurant, manners here refer to “manners that do not cause discomfort to the other party.
NG behavior at meals
- Eating with a clattering sound
- Putting elbows on the table
- Speaking with something in one’s mouth
- Respilling
- Treating waitstaff with an arrogant attitude
If you can think of any of the above, please try to improve them. If you do not, you may cause embarrassment to the Japanese woman you are talking to. Some of these habits may come out unconsciously, so it is important to be mindful of your manners on a daily basis.
Drinking too much alcohol is also bad manners. Try not to pace yourself too fast because of nervousness.
Also consider the preferences of Japanese women.
It is fine to plan your date in advance, but it is not a good idea to make decisions based solely on your favorite foods. It could happen that when you arrive at the restaurant, you find that it is a restaurant where she doesn’t like the food…and that is not good. If the Japanese woman is allergic to the food, it is even more difficult.
It is also effective to prepare several restaurant suggestions in case the food is not to your liking, and ask the Japanese woman to choose from among them. Since the final decision is hers, she is less likely to be dissatisfied.
Alternatively, the two of you can decide together according to your mood at the time.
Avoid expensive restaurants
It is possible to get all worked up about having dinner at a fancy restaurant because it is a date, but before making a reservation, think about it a little. Can you behave at a level that won’t embarrass you at a fancy restaurant?
If you can confidently say yes, fine. But if you’re unsure, it’s wise not to. There are many customs in high-class restaurants, such as table manners, dress code, tipping system, and so on. If you don’t do well, you may give a bad impression to the Japanese woman, and if she is not used to such a restaurant, you both may become nervous. If the Japanese woman is not accustomed to such restaurants, you may both become nervous, and you may not remember the taste of the food or the content of the conversation.
It is best to have dinner at a restaurant where you can relax and not be overwhelmed. If you are going to stretch yourself, do it just a little bit. That is the secret to an enjoyable meal.
Post-date e-mail
After the exciting first date is over, many men will send an e-mail to the Japanese woman they are dating. In fact, this post-date e-mail is also important. What is the best way to keep the date going and keep it alive for the next date?
Send the e-mail before the date is over!
The first thing to keep in mind is the timing of when to send the e-mail.
It is said that the best timing is when the Japanese woman arrives home. It is too early to send an e-mail immediately after a breakup, and too late to send it the next day. There is a pattern of daring to send a text the next day to make a strong impression, but there is a high possibility of failure, so do not do this on a first date.
The best time is around the time you arrive home because this is the moment when you feel relieved. Japanese women can read and reply to your e-mail with a sense of calmness, feeling your concern.
Don’t forget the thank-you note!
When it comes time to send an e-mail, you may be wondering how to begin your message, but the answer is simple. First of all, say “Thank you. There is no better way to thank a Japanese woman for spending the day with you.
After that, tell her how much fun you had. You can be specific about what you enjoyed. Japanese women will feel more comfortable if they know that you had a fulfilling time together.
If you make a mistake on a date, you can follow up with her here. If you say, “I was nervous, but I was glad to be with you,” it will not give a bad impression.
However, do not write too long; keep your message brief and to the extent that it is not too burdensome for the other party.
Express your desire to meet again
Sending a thank-you e-mail by itself will only give a good impression, and by the time you ask her out again at a later date, there is a possibility that the Japanese woman’s enthusiasm has cooled off. Be sure to end your e-mail after the first date with a note that hints at a next date, saying, “I want to see you again.
If a topic that will lead to the next date comes up during the date, you can say something like, “Let’s go to XXX next time! It is OK to write a rough idea of where you want to go and what the date will be like.
However, it is preferable to wait until a few days have passed before making a detailed appointment, as it may give the impression that you are being impatient.
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